Relatives and Postpartum Doulas; The Perfect Balance

With the holiday season upon us, we'll all be spending more time with family and friends. 

If you just had a baby, there will be plenty of family offering their assistance with your new baby. And although you need all the help you can get, there's definitely some pros and cons to help from relatives when it comes to baby care. 

Even with all this family around, parents can still benefit from postpartum doula care as they transition home with their new baby bundle. 

Your doula is there to support your whole household. 

Completely and on your terms. 

With a doula there's never any bias or judgement on the parenting styles you choose to implement, just compassionate and professional care for your entire family. The main objective of a postpartum doula is to give you some peace of mind, confidence, and bring new parents up to date on baby care basics. Your doula isn't trying to replace the role of a family member, they're a professional in the baby industry and are there to keep parents, siblings and baby safe, comforted and tended to. 

We love the support of family members and it's important to incorporate that into our children's lives. It can however be overwhelming for new parents to learn how to care for their baby with the opinions of their parents over their shoulder. It can be difficult for grandparents to separate from certain biases, but their intentions are good. 

Creating a balance of the two will keep new parents feeling supported and cared for on this journey of discovery. A new baby is a lot to navigate and it doesn't have to be on their own. Doulas can offer baby education and support to supplement the warm love and care your relatives provide. Every family is different and everyone has different value systems about family help when a new baby arrives. 

Sometimes families need to just get on the same page.

We feel passionately about the role of older generations supporting their children becoming first time parents. That's why we created the Grandparents Class at Maine Doulas. This program is launching in the new year and will give soon-to-be grandparents a course on newborn care, comfort measures and how to apply their parenting experience to their children's parenting decisions. This class is a great gift for grandparents to be, and can even help you break the news about your pregnancy! 

We offer services for every family and gift certificates for you to spread the joy and comfort to expectant parents in your life this holiday season. 

Browse our gift options here.

Where to Find That Holiday Glow

No matter what you celebrate this time of year, bringing light into the darkest days is a theme in many religions and winter routines. There is a special feeling that accompanies the sparkle of a string of lights or a flicker of a candle. Here we share some of the upcoming events in our communities to celebrate this winter tradition.

LL Bean Northern Lights

November 18-December 31 

LL Bean is changing things up this year. They are creating a Discovery Forest surrounding a geodesic dome featuring the aurora borealis, instead of their usual musical Christmas tree. The lighting and kick off celebration starts tomorrow (November 18th) at 6:45. The fun doesn’t end there, as Bean continues the holiday happenings with a model train village daily, and horse drawn wagon rides, reindeer barn (real reindeer!) and visits with Santa on the weekends. The events will wrap up on new year’s eve with their annual kiddo fireworks display. Check out their hashtag #llbeanmoment to share the fun!

Once you've enjoyed the epic holiday cheer at LL Bean, there are plenty of other wonderful TREE LIGHTING EVENTS around the state:

Christmas in Rockland

November 25-27th

These festivities kick off when Santa arrives by Coast Guard escort! He’ll help light the tree after a busy afternoon. The following day there are events all around town leading up to the Festival of Lights parade. The weekend wraps up with a breakfast with Santa on the 27th. A full family weekend!

Lighting of the Nubble Lighthouse, York

November 26th 4:30-7p  

What is more Maine than celebrating the holidays at a historic lighthouse? Cocoa, carolers and a visit from Santa round out this lighthouse lighting celebration!

Also in York on December 3rd at 4:30 is their Festival of Lights parade. 

Christmas in Kennebunk

November 26th 5-9  

Santa lights the tree while carolers sing! Opportunities to skate with Santa.

Tree Lighting and Fireworks Downtown Kennebunk

December 9th 5:30

Tree lighting and fireworks display at Dock's Square to kick off the holiday season in downtown Kennebunk. 

Holiday Fest 2016 at Millcreek, South Portland

December 2nd 4:30-7pm 

Horse drawn carriage rides, a visit with Santa and a tree lighting!

Old Fashioned Christmas, Bath

November 26th-December 31st 

The lighting of the tree starts the festivities, but this town celebrates in such a way that you’ll be transported back to simpler times. One highlight is their red letter box, where children can post letters to Old Saint Nick.

Night Tree Event at Wolfe’s Neck Farm, Freeport

December 3rd 9a-2p 

Get your tickets early for this family favorite! Admittedly, there’s no tree lighting here, but this sweet gathering follows the story of a family who feeds the forest animals by making special tree decorations. Each hour, beginning at 9am, the story is shared, then children can decorate a pinecone to bring into the forest on a short hike. A darling tradition to start with your young ones!

Light the Farm at Pineland, Gray

December 3rd 2-4:30p 

Face painting, candle making, walking the winter spiral will all precede the annual lighting of Pineland Farm!

Gardens Aglow at the Coastal Botanical Gardens, Boothbay

November 18th-December 31st 

A magnificent vision to behold as hundreds of thousands of holiday lights are strung amidst the beautiful gardens. Enjoy the sights as well as special food and drink at the cafe.

Festival of Lights Parade and Tree Lighting, Bangor

December 3rd 4:30p

This parade is sure to beam through the city, with over 70 entries set to dazzle with the theme "Holidays Around the World". At the end of the parade, the city will have its annual tree lighting.

Does your town have an annual holiday light display? We'd love to hear about it! Share in the comments.

Baby Nurse, Night Nanny, Postpartum Doula? Which is right for me?

You brought your new baby home and after paging through the folder from the hospital a startling realization creeps in:

This child did not come with an instruction manual!

She cries at the same time each night and all the bouncing, milk and #hailmarys in the world can't quiet this little lion's roar. Your mother calls it colic. Dr. Google calls this The Witching Hour. You're starting to dread the nightly spell she's casting over the house. As your partner leaves for work the next morning, you turn a bleary eye (the one you can open) to his equally exhausted face and you both say in unision "We need help!". You spend the morning with your baby on one knee and your laptop on the other Googling:

How can you ensure that you're choosing the best care for your family?

Baby nurse Portland Maine

Night nurse Portland ME

Night nanny Portland Me

Sleepless in Portland Maine

The last one just brings up terrible hotel reviews, and the other descriptions don't sound like quite what you're looking for. You discover that most baby nurses are not actually nurses, and they are responsible mostly for watching the baby. You don't need a babysitter. You may need help with your baby, but you need a boost of confidence and a healthy dose of sleep. 

Finally, you remember something your best friend told you about her postpartum experience. She hired a postpartum doula. But wasn't that just for mother's with postpartum depression? Still, your friend has never steered you wrong, so you type it in. Finally! This is the help you've been looking for!

The Postpartum Doula Advantage

You've been looking for your village and she's arrived in the form of your postpartum doula. Your doula is trained to ask the right questions to ensure that you are cared for in mind and body. You can enjoy a delicious amount of sleep when you're assured your baby is in the best hands. Your doula is fully supportive of your style of parenting; so you can get full breastfeeding support through the night or have your doula bottlefeed while you snooze. You can also rest easy through the day knowing; that small household tasks you would normally handle are being given attention, that your doula knows the most innovative baby gear to make life more smooth, that your choices for parenting will be embraced and encouraged.

Sure, you can see that your doula will hold your baby while you shower just like a baby nurse would. But when you're in fresh clothes, she will show you how to put your new pump together, help you swaddle your beautiful baby and tuck you both into your beds, so she can run to the grocery store for you. 

You deserve to be cared for, in this most precious time. Now put the computer to the side and rest easy. Sweet dreams!

The Way Birth Should Be - The Maine Doulas Difference

So, you're here because you've been thinking about a doula for birth or early parenting. Maybe you've talked to friends or your OB, done a Google search, clicked through Doula Match, and right about now you're wondering: What's the difference?

Here at Maine Doulas we pride ourselves on the professional service we provide to families in the Pine Tree State. We're always happy to share information about our model of care, our services and our history. However, when you're barely pregnant or just starting this adventure as a new parent, a doula may be a new concept. Here are three reasons we're the cream of the crop:

A Modern Doula for a Modern Family

• You've always known you were unique. And we know it too. Every family design is different and has individual needs. Whether you're currently a family of two or ten, whether you've come to parenthood through chance, trying or trial; we understand your dynamic life. Maine Doulas does doula a little differently.
• Through our organization, in birth support, you have a two doula team on call for you from the moment you sign a contract. You will feel connected to your team, like they're part of the family. You won't ever have to wonder about a mysterious "back-up". 
• With our postpartum care, you will also have an expertly trained doula on call for you. She will be ready to meet your family when you bring your baby home, or whenever you need extra support. Our doulas have short term, long term, daytime and overnight availability. Personalized, practical and compassionate care. Your family is worth it!

We are Recognized and Appreciated By Your Provider

• Chances are we've worked with your OB or midwife. They know us by name or by face, and they have probably seen us in the delivery room. We find these relationships allow for a greater sense of cohesiveness with everyone present. Our experience enables us to build deeper connections with local practices, ensuring that communication is clear and supportive. Providers and nurses have often expressed relief at knowing that we're with you, because they know you'll have the attention you need to feel confident in your labor while they're busy with hospital tasks. 

No Philosophy but Yours

• We are often asked "what's your birth philosophy?". Quite simply, our philosophy is yours. We are always the number one supporter of Team You. You want a natural birth? We support that. You want to circumcise your son? We've got your back. You want an epidural when you arrive at the hospital? We're on board. You want a VBAC? We've seen quite a few. As long as you have all the information you need around any aspect of birth or parenting, our sole mission is to make you feel completely embraced in your decisions. We understand that any choice a parent makes comes from a place of love and an eagerness to do the very best to ensure a happy, healthy future for their baby.  

These are just a few ways that Maine Doulas is leading the way for doula care in Maine. We invite you to give us a call. We can't say what difference you'll personally find; we can only be sure that you'll see it clearly.

This blog was written as part of the World Doula Week blog challenge.

8 Seriously Cool New Year's Eve Celebrations for Maine Kids

Fireworks, clam drops, and skating! What's on your agenda for counting down 2015 with your family? We searched the area; from Biddeford to Portland to Yarmouth to Freeport. Here are Maine Doulas' top finds for the seriously cool events happening on New Year's Eve day.

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1. Yarmouth's 4th Annual Clam Drop at Yarmouth First Universalist Church

97 Main St, Yarmouth ME | 7pm

Steamer, the Clam Festival mascot, will be lowered from the church belfry at 7pm. Music, cookies and cocoa! What could be better (or more Maine)?

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2. Children's Museum New Year's at Noon

142 Free Street, Portland, ME | 11:30am

Children are encouraged to wear their PJs to ring in the new year (at noon)! This shindig is free with admission to the museum. Be sure to arrive by 11:30 to join in all the fun. At 12 noon they will drop balloons to mark the occasion.

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3. Portland Library 2nd annual Family Contra Dance

5 Monument Way, Portland ME | 11am

Learn a variety of fun and easy dances suitable for children and adults.  Maggie Robinson, who has been calling dances for 8 years, will be the caller and local musicians will perform. No experience necessary!

From the library event listing:

Contra Dance is a type of social dance where parallel lines of dancers stand opposite — or “contra to” — their partners. A caller, usually working with a group of live musicians, guides new and experienced dancers alike through a variety of dances. Contra dancing is about social interaction, meeting people, and making new friends, set to music. The accompanying music for contra dances includes, but is not limited to Irish, Scottish, and French-Canadian folk songs. The fiddle is considered the core instrument, though other stringed instruments such as the guitar and mandolin are used as well.

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4. South Portland Library's 3rd Annual Noon Year Party

482 Broadway St, South Portland ME | 11:30am

Can’t stay awake until midnight? Come ring in the new year with our 3rd annual Noon Year Party instead! This all-ages event will take place on Thursday, December 31 from 11:30 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. at the Main Library. Featuring fun crafts, story time, balloons, and a fantastic countdown to noon, this is sure to be a blast for the whole family! Feel free to wear your favorite PJ’s, dress to impress, or just come as you are. We can’t wait to welcome in the new year with you!

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5. LL BEAN'S NEW YEAR'S EVE CELEBRATION

LL Bean Campus, Discovery Park, Freeport ME

LL Bean always makes it exciting for the whole family. Ring in the New Year with their festive "KidNight," featuring live music from Rick Charette and a wintertime fireworks display at 6pm. 

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There are a few venues for ice skating, which always has great opportunities for silliness and laughter. Not to mention how much energy it uses! Can you say "early night"?

6. The Rink at Thompson's Point

10 Thompson's Point, Portland ME

This is the perfect place for the whole family to enjoy some skating fun. With their beautiful warming room and heated lounge, there are great spaces for even the smallest ones to stay warm while family and friends skate. They also feature on-site food vendors and warm beverages to keep your energy up. A great NYE day adventure for everyone!

7. Biddeford Ice Arena

14 Pomerleau Street, Biddeford ME

Another great option for family fun. They offer snacks and cocoa to keep you skating the day away! Open for all ages and abilities.

8. Portland Pirates New Year's Eve Celebration at Family Ice Center

20 Hat Trick Drive, Falmouth ME | 1:20pm

Portland Pirates' New Year's celebration from 1:20pm-2:40pm will feature Salty Pete, a Pirate's shooting bay, free food, and giveaways!

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Or how about these options? Cozy up with your favorite hot beverage & a winter fairy tale, or put on some festive music & have a rockin' living room dance party! 

Whatever you do, we hope this final celebration of 2015 brings you and your family lots of joy! Happy New Year!

Are you drinking that? I thought you were breastfeeding!

‘Tis the season for holiday gatherings, celebrations and festivities. For breastfeeding mothers it often feels like a really gray area – breastfeeding and alcohol consumption. Champagne toasts, festive cocktails, egg nog, hot toddies, wine with dinner or appetizers, whatever you like to indulge in during the season it all comes into question when we are now breastfeeding a new or even an older baby. What are you supposed to do? Pump and dump? Supplement? Breastfeed as usual? It's all so confusing!

Let the doulas and the lactation professionals ease your mind a little bit.

Current research shows that the occasional use of alcohol does not appear to be harmful to breastfed babies (1-2 drinks) and the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) states that no more than 0.5 g alcohol per kg of body weight – SAY WHAT? 

Here's the breakdown -  a woman weighting about 60 kg (132 lbs) can have approximately 2 oz liquor, 8 oz wine (two 4 oz glasses) or 2 beers (two 12 oz beers). They recommend that nursing should take place 2 or more hours after the alcohol intake to “minimize its concentration in the ingested milk”. But when it comes to pumping and dumping breast milk, let's use our judgement and consider all the facts: 

• Less than 2% of the alcohol you drink actually reaches your blood and milk and alcohol peaks in your system ½ - 1 hour after ingestion (of course variables include whether you've eaten or not, your body weight, percentage of body fat, etc.).
• There is nothing that shows it speeds the elimination of the alcohol from the breastmilk. 
• Alcohol does not hydrate you, in fact it does the opposite so it will not increase your milk supply
• Alcohol can also slow the milk ejection reflex or “let down” process so it may take longer to let down during your post alcoholic beverage nursing session.
• Alcohol does not accumulate in breastmilk.

THERE IS NO NEED TO PUMP AND DUMP - OTHER THAN FOR YOUR COMFORT.

What does that look like to the breastfeeding mother at a holiday party? 

One option might be to nurse your baby before the alcoholic beverage and, if it makes you feel comfortable, wait two hours after the beverage to nurse the baby again.

Fairly simple, right? 

With all the information out there, and guidelines available, the bottom line is use your best judgment: if you don't feel able to drive, you should not breastfeed your baby. 

We hope this eases your mind a little to enjoy a beverage or two at your festivities this holiday season. 

Happy Holidays and Cheers!

Our contributor today is the lovely Alison Vanderburgh; CLC, and birth & postpartum doula. She is mom to son, Luke, 4, as well as two step-daughters. Her passion for breastfeeding education and support was ignited when her son was born and she hasn’t looked back! It is her goal: 

to support mothers and partners through this incredibly life changing time.  To help mom bring her baby earth side in a peaceful, loving, supportive manner.  To help support mom transitioning to a new normal in the postpartum period and facilitate feeding assistance and education when needed.  I am honored to be chosen by you and consider this time very sacred.

You can reach her at alivanderburgh@gmail.com or 207.446.0276.